Akenshi ubuzima bw’urukundo usanga burangwa n’umunezero udasanzwe ariko rimwe na rimwe harigihe usanga hajemwo utubazo dutandukanye dushobora no gutuma abakundana batandukana bitewe n’amajambo hamwe n’ibiganiro bagirana, ubwo rero mu gihe hatabayeho kubanza kwitonda muvyo uvuga ushobora kwisamburirako urukundo muvyo utazi.
Murino nkuru, tugiye kubabwira ibintu 5 umuhungu wese agomba kwirinda kubwira umukobwa barikumwe m’urukundo mu gihe yipfuza ko urukundo rwabo ruramba.
1. Irinde kugereranya umukobwa mukundana n’uwo mwigeze gukundana mbere.
Irinde kubwira umukobwa mukundana amajambo nk’aya : uwo twakundana mbere yarameze uku nuku, yankorera ibi nibi …, aya majambo aramubabaza cane kuburyo ashobora no gutuma muhebana, kuko ntamukobwa numwe aba akeneye ko umugereranya n’uwo mwwigeze gukundana, tuvuge naho yoba amuzi canke haciye igihe kinini mutandukanye niwirinde kumugereranya nawe, kuko iyo ubandanya umubwira nkaya majambo bituma abona ko utarigabira uwo mwigeze gukundana.
2. Nimba akubajije ibijanye no kuba yiyongereye ibiro, irinde kumubwira ko yavyibushe
Abakobwa benshi baranka abahungu baza kubabwira ko bavyibushe cane , naho wewe woba ubona ko avyibushe bimwe birenze urugero canke we ubwiwe akaba avyivugira, aho warukwiye kureka kuvuga na kimwe ariko ukareka nyene akabandanya avyivugira , nyene abikubajije umubwire ko ari ibisanzwe, ko akingana nkuko yangana mukimenyana, ndetse wirinde kubimwemerera.. Kuko ngo iyo ubimwemereye aca acika intege akumva yuko ugiye kugabanya ukuntu wahora umukunda kandi umunezerererwa.
3. Irinde amajambo ashobora gutuma yibaza ko mutari ku rwego rumwe
Igihe umubwira amajambo yo kwishira hejuru umwereka nkaho mutari kurugero rumwe mu bwiza, mubutunzi n’ibindi nk’ibi , uba ushatse kumwereka ko atagukwiye, ibi rero ngo bimuca intege cane aho ashobora no kwigira atakubwiye kuko aba abonako umusuzuguye, ko mutazohuza kandi we hari abandi bamukeneye azi.
4. Irinde kubwira umukobwa ko udapanga kubaka urugo vuba canke ko utazi neza yuko ariwe muzobana
Mu gihe uri kumwe m’urukundo n’umukobwa akenshi aba yipfuza ko muzokubakana , rero iyo utagenda ubimubwira canke utavuga amajambo yerekeye kubana nawe, ibi birababaza abakobwa cane kuko aba yumva ko ushaka kumufata nk’igikinisho hanyuma haciye igihe ukamureka, mubisanzwe abakobwa ntamwanya bakunze guta murukundo ubwo iyo utamubwira ibintu vyerekana neza ko uzomutwara bituma yironderera uyundi, ubwo naho woba ubona ko utaravyizera neza ko uzomutwara canke ko uzokubaka urugo nawe, irinde kubimubwira no kubimwereka imbere yiwe.
5. Irinde kumubwira ubwoko n’urugero rw’abakobwa ukunda mu gihe uziko we atabikwije
Nimba uriko uravugana n’umukobwa ukamubwira ko ukunda abakobwa b’inzobe, barebare, bagenda gutya, bameze uku hamwe n’ibindi vyinshi kandi we atariko ari, ibi ngo biri mu biza kw’isonga bibabaza cane abakobwa kuburyo kugumana nawe m’urukundo aba yumva ko ataco bivuze kuriwe, ubwo wirinde kuvuga ibintu ukunda kubakobwa kandi ubona we atavyo afise, gerageza urabe ivyo umubonako ukunda abe arivyo umubwira.
Mu gihe rero muri mu rukundo ni vyiza ko amajambo avugwa ndetse n’ibiganiro mukorana ko muba mukwiye kuvyitondera cane kuko amajambo canke ibiganiro bibabazanya bishobora gutuma urukundo mukundana rusambuka.